All that we see or seem, is but a dream within a dream.

"All that we see or seem, is but a dream within a dream." - Edgar Allan Poe

I'm probably one of the few people who hasn't watched every episode of Friends.

It's not that I'm not a fan of the show - far from it.

I actually have this weird thing with television shows that I love. I tend to think that if I don't watch every episode, the programme hasn't really finished. It took me five years to actually watch the last episode of Sex and the City - and believe me, I wouldn't have even watched it then were the film not shortly being released.

When I was a kid I actually said, on numerous occasions, that if I could do anything when I grew up I'd write episodes of Friends.

I asked my mother if that was a real job and how I could go about doing it. She said it was indeed, a real job, but she wasn't sure how to go about doing it. When I asked around, people said that television was too competitive and that I'd be better off just doing an English degree and getting something realistic. (For those of you who actually have an English degree, please list your subsequent job in the comments box below. I'd be interested to find out what you did with it.)

I stopped saying that I wanted to write for Friends after speaking to my careers advisor. I am fully, fully aware that I wasn't advised very well, which is why I'm writing this blog, but whenever I asked anyone what I can do with an English degree, the only answer I ever got was "how about teaching?"

I'd mention other things I wanted to do and for nearly every single job I wanted there was someone telling me to steer clear because the job market was too competitive.

And like an idiot, I listened to them.

In the end, I chose to do a joint honours in English Literature and Psychology. It was an attempt at keeping my options open, thinking maybe I could go into clinical, or educational psychology. It turned out the answer was exactly the same. Every way I looked there was someone telling me to settle for something less than what I really wanted, to get an easy life, an easy job (Ha! As if such a thing exists!) just to save the hassle of encountering competition, because there's always some one out there that's better than me.

No one actually told me that most things in life are competitive.

Although I finished my psychology degree nearly a year ago now I'm still very much intersted in the subject, and dream studies in particular. This last week I've actually been a participant in a psycholgoy study where I've had to document my day in 3 sections -

• 5 Main Points of the Structure of my Day
• 5 Things that I've found Personally Significant
• 5 Major Concerns

I completed the diary every night before bed for two weeks, then I'd document the dreams I had that night.

The first disheartening thing after reading back my fortnight day journal was how mind numbingly boring my day might seem to someone reading it.

• Wake up, avoid the gym.
• Have coffee, scold myself, vow to cut back the next day.
• Eat cake, scold myself, vow to cut back the next day.
• Avoid dissertation.
• Watch television until I fall asleep.

And repeat.

No wonder everyone was telling me to steer clear of exciting job. Why would anyone want to take on someone like me?

There was some differentiation on a few days. I started my BBC training for 3 days of those two weeks.I've also been fortunate enough to be offered the opportunity to try my hand as a production assistant for a seven week radio programme, Group Therapy FM, and both have been literally amazing experiences.

When it came to recording my dreams, I couldn't help but think of the person who would be reading them after I returned them to be analysed.

I couldn't help but ask, just as I would for an interview - what does this person want from me?

Dream of flying? Of being a big movie star? A model, actresses? My deepest, darkest thoughts as an extension of my inner wants, needs and psyche?

"The best thing about dreams is that fleeting moment, when you are between asleep and awake, when you don't know the difference between reality and fantasy, when for just that one moment you feel with your entire soul that the dream is reality, and it really happened." James Arthur Baldwin"

I couldn't believe it. It turns out, when I actually sit down and document my dreams - I'm doing exactly what I'm doing in the day.

That night I'd re-done my BBC training in my sleep. I had nightmares about the gym where I was chased by oversized pieces of Sara-Lee. I transcribed radio documents long into the night, well after I'd switched off my computer.

I was worried about being boring and having to justify myself to a researcher because I'd go to bed every night and do the same thing as the day before. I couldn't help but wonder how was I going to be able to pave my way in a competitive job market when I was a living, breathing example of someone who was...

And then it dawned on me.

After all the ridiculous advice I've had, from people who have tried to put me off doing what I want to do in life, and others who have been plain rude about offering people help and expertise...

Hey - I'm actually living my dreams!

In some warped, twisted way at least. I took a long hard look at my dream diary, and couldn't help but ponder my life in general.

Some days, it can be all too easy to measure your life in negatives. The number of your scales. The cups of coffee you drank that day, the deadlines waiting on your desk. The people who try to put you down with back handed compliments. I know I'm not quite there yet, and I have a long, long way to go before I reach any of my true goals, but that that day, as I emailed off my fortnight to a stranger in a lab, I put on a new episode of Friends, poured myself a cup of coffee and helped myself to a really big slice of cake, and couldn't help but think to myself -

Things really ain't that bad.

So go out. Do what you want to do. Don't let anyone stand in your way, and if someone's advice plain sucks, go out. Get your own second opinion, based on your own experience.

And to all the people who say you can't have your cake and eat it too,

I say why not?